At the heart of change is working with ambivalence--contradictory ideas, behaviors, and feelings which occur even when a change is strongly desired.
Though counter-intuitive, taking a respectful stance and seeking understanding can soften the grip of contradictions and convert them into something that can be worked on. (Kegan and Lahey, 2009)
In organizations, "working on" may mean talking through the implications of a change or problem solving barriers or lowering perceived risk by testing new actions on a small scale. Slowing down for such exploration and problem solving enables better outcomes in the long run. Mere compliance pushes contradictions underground, drawing creative energy out of the system.
"People often get stuck not because they fail to appreciate the downside of their situation but because they feel at least two ways about it. The way out of that forest has to do with exploring and following what the person is experiencing and what, from his or her perspective, truly matters…. It is when people experience acceptance of themselves as they are that change becomes possible.” (Miller and Rollnick, 2013)
Though counter-intuitive, taking a respectful stance and seeking understanding can soften the grip of contradictions and convert them into something that can be worked on. (Kegan and Lahey, 2009)
In organizations, "working on" may mean talking through the implications of a change or problem solving barriers or lowering perceived risk by testing new actions on a small scale. Slowing down for such exploration and problem solving enables better outcomes in the long run. Mere compliance pushes contradictions underground, drawing creative energy out of the system.
"People often get stuck not because they fail to appreciate the downside of their situation but because they feel at least two ways about it. The way out of that forest has to do with exploring and following what the person is experiencing and what, from his or her perspective, truly matters…. It is when people experience acceptance of themselves as they are that change becomes possible.” (Miller and Rollnick, 2013)